find a restroom sir

I am exhausted. Today was long.

I'm excited to go to the Iowa game this weekend. We will be heading out right after I finish practice. Should be a blast. I'm kind of packing right now. In the process anyways. I have the tickets out and my Halloween costume. I need to grab my camera too; would be a shame if I forgot that.

Our game today was much better than Tuesday. I saw a little improvement in areas that we stressed. We started off really well in both games which was good. I was also impressed that some of the kids started using some of the skills that we have been working on in practice in the game. They're picking it up a little better. Our out of bounds play was also money. We should have scored a few more points off of it.

I went to dinner with Jen today. She is going through a rough time. I am glad I was able to hang out with her. We were sitting in my car talking when I took her home and someone came up and just peed in her driveway right in front of us. It was ridiculous. There wasn't much we could do about it either. She said it wasn't the first time that someone did that. Some people are strange.

I am going to get some more prep work done for the morning. Big weekend ahead. GO HAWKS!

all together now

It looks like I've generated a little interest within a certain company. I'm okay with the corporation reading my blog. I don't really feel that I have anything to hide. I'm an honest person and if they have any questions I would be more than willing to answer them. They've known since the first career fair I went to that I was interested in professional schooling. It shouldn't be a big surprise.

As of right now if a company did offer me a position I wouldn't be able to decide upon it until next year anyways. I have to begin the process because there are no guarantees that I will have a job or a spot in a school.

Yippie! Today was one of the best days I've had in a long time. I started out with my interview at Iowa. I got there a little early because I was unsure if I would be able to find the room. I hope that didn't ruin anything. All the interview questions were ones that I had anticipated. I'm glad I did research online to find the questions that were going to be asked. It really would have been tough if I didn't find those.

I think my toughest question was "What is your life mission?" The second toughest was "What do you want to do if you don't get into Dental School?" I would be more sure of that but I was made aware of the Teach for America program, and now I'm torn between that and Engineering Consulting. With Teach for America I could earn a Master's or continue coaching. Eek! I would love to do it, but after meeting with students today I am totally for Dental School.

I guess all the preparation work is done for my Iowa application. Now I just have to wait until December 1st to find out. Hopefully I'll be selected within the first group.

I had another interview with Cerner today. The second round. The first round went a lot smoother. I ran into two speed bumps in the behavioral part of the interview. The second half of it was more technical and while I didn't know some of the terminology I knew the concepts. I'm getting more comfortable with interviews. I'm looking forward towards my next opportunity at Nebraska on Monday.

Practice today was amazing. I felt like the kids accomplished a lot. They really listened during the second half and I think gained a better understanding of the mistakes that we made. Hopefully we'll be able to put it into the game tomorrow. I don't think we'll be able to run the offensive plays, but I think if we correct the three big things we worked on in practice we'll be in the game.

One more thing to mention for today... :-D I don't even know what to say about it; it made me so happy! The interview that I was prepared for, practice, and then seeing her (and making her smile) really made my day. She was so cute! I just wanted to take her home and snuggle up with her and fall asleep. There is this thing she does when I do something for her that I love. I'm not going to say what it is because I feel kind of dorky for liking it!

I hope she chooses me.

short intermission

I just got done with my interview and tour of Iowa. I really want to go to Dental School now. It was so cool!

Okay enough I have to get going here!

motherly love

I had a good evening. I feel bad about my mistake today but I took responsibility for it. I know that was the right thing to do (taking responsibility). I stand by my values/decision but not by the way I went about conveying it. I was frustrated and did not react accordingly.

I talked to my mom for 40 minutes on the phone this evening. She made me feel better. I love my mommy. I was just stressed today. I made it through and the last part of my day was good for the way the first part went.

Tomorrow is our first basketball game. I'm nervous for that. I also have an interview for a job. Hopefully it will help prep me for the Dental School interview. I'm studying a lot of the same questions (for both). I'm more worried about the game. I just want the kids to have fun. I didn't really condition them that much; hopefully they'll be able to go the whole game.

I just took a break to set my roster for tomorrow. Stressful because they're all wonderful kids but they can't all play.

I am much relieved of stress after talking to Nanci and my Mom. I tried to talk to Jen but she kind of shoved it down my throat. I'm a little upset about that. I'll forgive her but it really hurt my feelings.

I feel sick to my stomach right now. I just ate a lot of Pringles but I don't think that is why I am sick.

I left my interview questions at home today. I was sad. I got them out and put them on my bag but when I walked out I forgot something and set them on my bed before I left and never put them back in my bag.

Today wasn't the best day of my life. I still have 5 more hours of it. I'm not going to sit here and sulk. I made mistakes today. I'm not really proud of them but I can't get them back. I can just learn from them.

ambition

I didn't get anything done today. I slept pretty much the whole day. I doubt I will be able to get to sleep tonight. It has been a long time since I haven't been able to sleep at night. Tonight would be because I slept all day not because things would be keeping me up.

I have three interviews this week. Two at dental schools and one at another company. I don't really feel the pressure right now. Wednesday will probably be a different feel though. It has come time to see where I'm at I guess. I think I know what I want right now a lot more so than I did at the beginning of school. No matter what happens I will do my best. I don't give up that easily.

I'm going to need something warm and fuzzy here soon. Last night was pretty good for me. I'm a little worried but I am doing my best and that is all that one can ask of me :). I've never been one to be very confident. I'm kind of a shy person until I can spend some time to open up. I'm just a little frustrated hearing the same lines. I don't know what to think because EVERYONE tells me them. I heard them from my parents, my ex-girlfriend, my counselor this summer, my best friends. It just seems like people are trying to put a band-aid on me to make me feel better. I think in all reality it just comes down to me figuring out who I am. I didn't really have a chance before in my life.

I'm glad that someone talked to me and told me that I was too unselfish. I need to go get ready to get what I want. I know I can do it; I'm going to do it for myself too. Just watch. Come next Monday I'll feel like a million bucks, and it won't be because I had a Runza. I'm going home!!! I'm excited. Lincoln will be fun. I can't wait to go back to the place where I began growing up. I like being a little kid. :-P Maybe a little too much.

maybe someday

Growing up is so fun :).

The million dollar question: Who am I?

I feel much better right now. I'm glad I got caught up on all the confusion last night.

I am going to go take a nap.

last night (take two)

my eye has been twitching lately. i don't know if it is a problem or not. have a good night.

and it's only 8

Jarod is sad tonight.

"that is a good thing"

I studied quite a bit tonight! I have an exam tomorrow. I'm going to study more in the morning. Hopefully this time I will be ready for the A and B and the complex multiple choice problems. Those are the ones that messed me up last time.

The kids found out which team they wanted to be on today. It was fun to see the kids come up to the glass window and look for which team they were on. One of the kids yelled, "I'M ON COACH JOHNSON'S TEAM!" It was great. Quite a few of the kids that weren't on my team came up to me and asked, "Why didn't you pick me?" I had to explain that we didn't "pick" teams. I also stated, "I can't have all of you!"

I'm glad so many of the kids like me. I'm a much better coach after football. I'm really happy that I was able to be an assistant for that. It set me up well. I have a lot more responsibilities now.

I love coaching! I don't think I would have as much fun if I coached High School. It might be fun to try at some point but working with the Junior High kids is the best.

Three of my friends called me tonight! I talked to each of them for about fifteen minutes before they had to go. I probably should have been studying but I'm happy to make time for people who want to talk to me. Some interesting topics came up with each of them. One of them kind of surprised me; I guess I'm out of the loop sometimes, or I'm just oblivious.

I need to get back to studying!

banana split

I'm going to write early tonight because I have a lot of homework to do and I will stay up way too late if I get on the computer after I get home this evening.

This Monday wasn't so bad. I'm pleasantly surprised. Usually Monday is long because of my four classes that I have in a row. I wasn't too sleepy at work either. I didn't get too much done; I decided that answering all the multiple choice stems is way too much to do. I think I'll just go over the chapters again. I spent a lot of time searching.

I kind of just sat at work and stared at the computer today. I was deep in thought :). I guess that is a good and bad thing. Good because I really need to mull over somethings in my head right now and bad because I could be doing homework. I need to get through Wednesday (my first exam) and then I can begin to start preparing for my Dental School interviews.

I got my "Thank You's" mailed out today. I have one left and I don't know if I should mail it or not. It is for writing a Letter of Recommendation for me but the person hasn't written it yet. I might just shoot the person an email and then wait. The interview with Accenture didn't get me to the second round. I wouldn't mind working for them but I guess I don't really have that choice right now. Maybe in the Spring. I sent the interviewer a written Thank You today. Maybe they didn't get it in time or maybe I was just beat out. Either case I feel like the written note is more meaningful than an email. I am writing written ones and mailing them from now on. I was influenced to do this because of "The Last Lecture". I think it takes more effort and is more sincere; granted I wasn't invited to the second round so it will end up in the trash I believe I did the right thing.

We split the kids talent wise today. I was a little upset that we didn't sit down and talk about the kids. We just stood there at practice and sorted them out. The other coach doesn't really want to be there any longer than he has to be. I'm sure he is busy but I think the split could have been done a little more professionally. I guess we'll see what happens. I didn't end up with the team that I would have liked to coach (the only reason I want the other one is because I had most of the kids in football). The coach gave me the option to switch but the flip was fair. I'll leave it up to him; we agreed to flip a coin and that is where it is at. I'm not going back on my word.

I got to talk to Steve a little more about my issues. He calmed me down quite a bit. Finally someone was able to listen to what I was saying and give me a direction. I'm not coming down on anyone else I've talked to here because most others haven't really dealt with the situation of growing up. Steve is old now! Well he always was old. I'm going to have to go visit him this winter. We'll have a wild time!

I am excited Tuesday is almost here! I get to eat at Wendy's. Tuesdays I've make it a tradition. Yum. Okay off to Swing Dancing, and then homework.

suncrisp and keepsake

Today was fun. I think it was pretty productive. I woke up kind of late but I got the most out of my day! I went and picked up some supplies for my date. It was fun!

We went to Wilson's Orchard and picked apples and then made apple pie together. I think she had a fun time; sometimes it is hard to tell. I had a good time. It was fun going and tasting the apples and then picking them out. I'm glad it was such a nice day. We probably picked more apples than we needed but I'm sure they'll all get used eventually. I also bought an apple turnover for us to share. It was delicious and worth every penny I paid for it.

Making the pie with her was fun too. She doesn't cook much and I like cooking so it is kind of something that I can kind of take the lead on. I think that is a lot of the fun. She was so cute today too; there was a time when we were both standing in front of the oven and I just couldn't help but smile. I hope she had as much fun as I did; I know she doesn't like the outdoors as much as I do so I hope it was an okay idea. Some of my friends (who are girls) that I told about it thought it was a cute idea; it definitely brought a smile to my face.

I wish I could know what she is thinking sometimes. She knows I like her; the other day when I saw her before the game I had the biggest smile on my face. I don't know if that is a good thing or a bad thing. She probably takes advantage of it sometimes but at this point that is okay with me.

I have a few things in mind that I wish she would do for me. They aren't really specific things but they are things that I'd like to see happen. She has done a few already and that is good. It really isn't about receiving for me though; I like giving. Especially when I knows it makes people happy.

On a lighter note I need to buy some stamps to mail out my "Thank Yous" and applications. That is the primary task for tomorrow.

fair enough

Quick movements are bad right now. I'm recovering from last night and this morning still. I'm going to try to make it a little longer before I hit the hay. I feel like curling up in a ball right now with my teddy bears. That will make me happy. They're pretty much the only things that will sleep in my bed with me.

I'm a softy.

I have a few things that are pissing me off right now. I think that it is just frustrating when people will say one thing and be stout in it and then completely go against it with the actions that he/she takes. Another thing is that I can't really talk about some of the things I want to talk about because it turns into a conversation about something else completely. Oh well.

I have lost my train of thought for tonight.

I'm talking to Steve right now. We haven't talked in awhile. I wish I could help him out. He is a guy that has always been there for me and yet I've never met him.

I'm really struggling with this one central idea in my life right now. I think it is going to be a long struggle. It is funny how so much of my life is decided by other people.

not even a penny

The one thing I care about most in my life doesn't seem to be working out. It just really sucks. I work so hard and then end up with a horrific feeling inside. I've tried but you can't really change how others feel.

I have improved my life in so many areas but all of that doesn't make up for the lacking in others. I just wish things weren't so difficult sometimes. Maybe there is a reason for the things that happen in my life.

I know the brick walls are there for me to show me how bad I want it, but I can only bust through so many. The biggest one seems to be getting taller and taller. Sigh. Maybe someday.

I feel worthless right now.

iso motivation

Where shall I begin. How about last night. I studied quite a bit! I actually should have done more but my brother was watching the debate and I wanted to catch a bit of it. McCain is really stiff. Obama didn't really seem sincere in his closing remarks. I'd say that Obama is too liberal for me. He talks about change; which I don't doubt will happen but I don't know if it will be for the best. McCain offers a little too much of what we've had for the last 8 years. I think it is a tough choice.

I am kind of leaning one way but I'll wait a little longer to decide. It isn't like my vote either way will really matter in Johnson County anyways. Obama is going to win the county by a long shot. I bet he wins the state pretty big too. Whoever wins better get the country back on the right track.

This morning's test was decent. It was 13 choose 6. I knew around 4-5 fairly well and I kind of had to expand a little on what I kind of knew about the others. I wasn't really pressed for time and I think I said enough to do fairly well. I guess it depends on how the rest of the class did. I thought it was a tough test.

My second test was not very good. I got 80/100. I didn't really study for that one either. It was ProE (which is computer modeling of a part you want to fabricate). I was pretty close to finishing it but I just didn't have enough time. I kind of had to go with the flow. I didn't know all the shortcuts to make the part really fast so I had to draw a lot of little nit picky things. The average was around 56 so I'd say I did fairly well. Tomorrow I have another exam in that class. Can't say I've prepared too much for that one either. I am going to get on that.

Basketball today was fun! We're evaluating talent so I don't really coach too much. The kids I have are those that have just started basketball. They'll improve a lot throughout the season once we split into teams and I can work with them at a lower level. I'm excited that they have room to improve!

I haven't really eaten a good dinner (that I cooked; Jen made some really good pasta on Tuesday in exchange for a Mint Cheesecake) this week. I had frozen pizza tonight. Tomorrow night should be a exciting dinner. I'm looking forward to it a lot. I just have to make it through a test and an interview. After my interview my day gets fun! Well kind of... I still have a lot going on next week :(.

Onto flag football. The season was fun. We didn't win but that really isn't what matters to me. I had a lot of fun with the team. Tonight was wet, cold, and muddy.

Don't really have much to say. Nothing happened today that made me think beyond the daily routine. Oh! I named my rubber duckie! Mr. Flappy! :)

What is this thing called time and where did all of mine go? I can't figure out where I lost all my time and looking for where it went will cause me to lose more.

I really need to just decide what my priorities are right now. I have three jobs, school, and I am looking for jobs/professional schools. Bleh. It just seems like I have so much on my plate right now I never get time to just sit down for a second. The next two weeks are ridiculous. I have three exams this week; work has picked up and it is time dependent. I also have some interviews coming up. I need to apply for another job tonight as well. The deadline is tomorrow. Projects are taking a lot of time as well. I should be doing more tonight but I'm just overwhelmed. :(

I really enjoy coaching. It is by far the BEST part of my day. It just gets me away from school and real life. I really enjoy working with the kids. They enjoy my presence too. I have a few that act as coach's pets. I won't be coaching them though because they'll be on the A team. I think they'll like the A team coaches too.

So one of my friends made me really happy today. Jen gave me a rubber duckie! It was exciting. I got rid of all my old ducks because Alison gave them to me and I'm done with that. It made me happy. Jen knows what I like and how to make me happy. I'm glad that I have one friend like that. Not to many people do special things for me. I'm glad I am a nice person and can do things that make others happy. It is so much more rewarding when you can see someones appreciation. I'm still not perfect but sometimes it is the little things that make people tick.

So I need to just start flipping some coins to decide what I want in my life. I've thought about getting out a few pieces of paper and writing down everything that I like about all my choices. I might do it. Flipping a coin seems to be so much easier. I should flip one now to see if I should go to bed or study. It is 9:00 but I am exhausted. I need to study a little.

I'm kind of down tonight. My eyes are watering a bit now. I just feel like so much is going on. My life is a helluva lot better than it was last year but I just don't really feel like it is going anywhere. It might just be easier to sleep than stay up and think about all the choices I have to make. I've done a lot of work to get myself to where I am today but the road ahead is long. To get to where I want to be is a lot more work than I feel capable of doing right now. I just don't feel like anyone will appreciate me for who I am or understand me. I don't really feel unique.

I'm just going to go to bed. I don't really feel any better after writing.

ears ringing

Monday is over! Hooray! Well I enjoyed the last part of my day much more than the beginning. Work was kind of boring. Class was just average; although I did give a pretty good definition of what a group was in PASPA. I'm so the over achiever that sits in the front row (except I kind of tested the water on the first test and I know how I need to study).

More so I have to get a new senior design project; third time. Yes not fun. Stressful can we say. Just when I think that class is settling down it gets upended. I need to call Nebraska back to schedule my interview there. I kind of want to do it when I can go to a Husker game, and I want to take one of my friends with me for the day so it isn't so lonely. I don't know of anyone that would sacrifice a Friday of class for me.

I'm looking forward to tomorrow because I can nap. I will also probably go have a Spicy Chicken Sandwich for lunch at Wendy's since I have kind of made a tradition out of that on Tuesdays. I skip breakfast usually so the fatty meal is ok by my standards.

Basketball was oodles of fun today. The kids really like me as a coach. I think now that I'll be a head coach I can get a lot out of them. It really helped me to be an assistant in football and I am so grateful towards Kris (the head coach) for all he did. I thanked him but I don't think it goes to show how much he did for me.

Swing Dancing tonight was good! I wasn't as horrible as last week. I think it was just kind of a fluke. Last week I just didn't really feel like being there and I was also a little frustrated with the people I had to dance with. We're all learning (and I sucked too) so I guess all is fair.

I got picked up after lessons. It kind of surprised me that she came to get me. It was really nice of her. I was planning on stopping by the bank to get money since she said she bought tickets already. It would have been slipped in her purse or back pocket to pay for them but she was waiting for me in her car.

Alyssa got so giddy for the concert. I don't think I will ever be that happy for a concert. There are a few bands I would get excited for (July for Kings, Third Eye Blind, Graham Colton, Safety Suit) but none like she was. July for Kings would probably get the biggest rise out of me. I would say that there are a few things in life that will make me that happy:

Getting a new teddy bear.
Probably a Packers Game (I've never been to one).
A girl doing something for me that she knows I like.
A big time Iowa Football Game (i.e. Iowa vs. USC in the Orange Bowl or more recently Iowa vs. OSU under the lights).
Getting another tattoo would probably do it as well (this won't come for a long time in my life though [if ever]).

Having my friends show up to my birthday party would have done it as well.

Anyways I'm glad we got to go out and do something. It had been awhile since we have done something besides hang out. I know it was important to her that we go since her roommate Alyssa probably wouldn't have gone if we didn't go with her.

I have to say I liked the last two bands. I really like the acoustic part of Minus the Bear. I'm not really into the jumping around thing or moving with the beat. I just don't feel comfortable doing that for a band I've never heard. Kind of would have felt as if I were doing it to fit in. That isn't me. I enjoyed it but I just can't bring myself to jump on a bandwagon because everyone else is doing it. I might come of as if I'm not having a good time for it but so be it.

Her goodnight kiss was just what I needed. :)

Goodnight!

no longer a red letter day

I'm proud of myself for today!

I am really sweaty right now. It has been warm the last two days. I got my hair cut today. The lady that cut it was really nice to me. She asked me how I normally did my hair; I told her that it was dependent on what time I woke up. She laughed at me for that; in a fun way though.

So true though. I have been waking up really late usually. Pretty much days I wear a hat I don't shower in the morning on. I haven't really done my hair lately either. It was hard to do when it was longer. I'll probably do it tomorrow (if I wake up early enough).

Dinner with Matt, Ben, and Eric tonight was good. We got to watch Dallas/Arizona game ending. It was pretty intense. I'm glad I got to see the guys tonight. I invited Ben and Matt to dinner and they both were able to come this time. It was fun!

I have about 100 pages left in my book. I've been slowly chipping away at it. I really am enjoying this one a lot. I think it might even be my favorite Sedaris book. We'll see. I might be biased because I thought two of the chapters so far were just hilarious. Who knows.

I am happy! I got to talk to Christie on the phone tonight.

all carved up

I made it through Saturday without doing any homework! Whew. I did laundry though. I washed my bed sheets and pillow cases. I think I mixed up my firm and soft pillows though. I don't know which is which. I'll have to see if the tag says or something. I'm still the only one that has slept in my new bed. It is sad; I've had it awhile too.

I got to talk to Jen today while she was driving home. I'm glad she figured somethings out in her life. I bought the Creme de Menthe finally so that I can make the Mint Cheesecake for her. I figured I'd do it. I kind of feel like an alcoholic with all the wine and liqueur I bought.

I was really tired on Friday night. I took a nap and then woke up and finished the bottle of wine from Tuesday's dinner. Anyways back to Jen's conversation. It was kind of awkward but I enjoyed it. She was telling me about something that had happened and I said something that was not intended to be perverse and she just laid it on me. I didn't really expect that from Jen! It was kind of the first time she turned the tables one me. I'm usually the one twisting her words (except the way she twisted mine was actually what had happened). It was great.

I had dinner with Nanci tonight. I also roped her into making a pumpkin with me. She paid for dinner for my birthday. I'm glad I used that rain check. I hate rain checks. They usually don't ever get used. I have one from Nanci from my 21st birthday that I haven't used. Kind of ridiculous. I thought I'd just use the one that she gave me from my 22nd. She is a good friend. I'm glad that she was here this summer to keep me company through the rough times. I don't know if I'd be here today if it wasn't for her. She also let me vent a little about things that have been on my mind.

The pumpkin took forever to carve. I was looking for a bear picture online and when I was trying to make them into a pattern in Photoshop they weren't coming out very well. I just decided to do my tattoo. It was way to complex. It would have been fine if the pumpkin was huge but I picked out a small one. It turned out better than I thought it would when I removed the pattern. It was like there were dots everywhere and I didn't know which was which.

I'm going to head to bed and get some rest. The pumpkin took a large amount of the evening but I enjoyed it. Artsy stuff is fun. :)

My Thursday was the most amazing day of the week. Oh em gee. It was good. I woke up late and made it to calss on time; and then I talked to the police and got everything straightened out. I actually talked to the police Wednesday as well but today I ahd a formal interview with them.

We won our last football game too! That put us at 44-20. It was pretty fun. I thought the kids were kind of flat in the second half but then they picked it up after the other team scored. We finished 3-2. That is pretty good; tomorrow is the pizza party.

I also got another interview! So I have quite a few coming up. I have one with Nebraska, Iowa, and hopefully a few businesses that I am looking at. I'm excited about the interview at Nebraska. It is my home state! Also I'm out of state so it is kind of hard to get an interview because I'm not really a top applicant. It should be fun to go to Lincoln! I'm excited for Runza too! Yum.

Tonight I went out with Dan to Piano Lounge. It has been a long time since I have been there. My favorite place. We have 3 martini's left on the list and then we've gone through it all. We did 6 tonight and then Taco Bell.

I'm going ot go to bed now. I have to work at 8:00 :). I think I can make it since I made it on my birthday. I wish someone was here.

police

So I got a phone call from the police today. Yeah not fun. I guess the office lady shouldn't have been able to get money to pay everyone or something. I'm really confused about what is going on. I answered some questions tonight and someone might be coming to work tomorrow to ask me more.

Dinner was good though. I'm glad she let me take a moment out to talk to the police too. I'm just going to cooperate and answer all the questions to the best of my knowledge. I hope no one did anything wrong.

I really don't need this in my life right now. I'm already stressed out about finding a job and applying to dental schools. Enough is enough.

I'm glad I got to hang out with her tonight. It really took my mind off of stressful things. She is so cute. I really liked her pants tonight and I wish she could have stayed. I have to get up in five hours.

Today was long. I sucked it up at swing dancing too. No compliments this week. I need to work on the stepping part. I also have to lead. It sucks when I have to decide what to do. It is really hard! My brain doesn't think like that.

I'm eating a lot of Sun Chips now. I should have not opened this bag. I'll finish it tonight!

I got paid today from my summer job. It is all in my hands now. I have to send a letter to Workforce Development now saying I got paid. Can't forget to do that. Tomorrow I'm making dinner for someone special! I'm excited. Hope she likes what I was planning on cooking.

Practice was hilarious today. I overheard the kids talking; not something that I can repeat here. I chuckled though. It was some of the same stuff my friends joked about at that age. I guess it is just a process.

We're having a Pizza Party Friday. I'm excited for it! It will be fun to get the kids together. They've all grown so much as a team. I'm excited about our game Thursday. It is just too bad that it has to be our last.

page two

This weekend was pretty darn fun. From Friday until today. I didn't get much homework done but I had a great time with friends!

Friday started off with my team's last Friday practice. It was a fun practice for the kids. We played a lot of fun games rather than traditional drills. You can't really teach much new material to them on a Friday. They usually forget it over the weekend. It is the last week of coaching football. I can't believe how fast it has flown by. It is really sad. I think basketball will be fun but you can't beat football. At this point in my life I can sit back and say that if someone came up to me and told me I could spend an hour of my life reliving any portion of it (or doing anything I want) I would choose to go back and play a game of high school football. Hands down nothing comes close. I'm not a player anymore; this is something that is important to realize when coaching. I'm a coach now and I have different responsibilities. It is fun but in a different way. I included a picture of my team and my "Authorization Certificate". Two things that I am really proud of hence each of them get a spot on my wall above my desk. These kids are people that I will remember for the rest of my life. Hopefully I have influenced them in a way that they will do the same for me. I've learned a lot from my experience with them.

I'll end my rant and get back to the weekend. Friday night after practice I went to the West Homecoming game for Junior High Appreciation Night. It was fun to talk to some of my old teachers but some of the same questions I have had to answer in the past came up. I'm sick of answering them. I was talking to Matt about my frustration and here is what he said. I've heard this from Jen too.

(5:21:22 PM) Matt: well from my view...and take it for what it is
(5:21:39 PM) Matt: you have changed a ton since being with her and it has been for nothing but for the good
(5:22:11 PM) Matt: honestly, you are a much more enjoyable person to be around and it seems like you are loving life

I'm proud of myself. I agree with both of them completely. I'm glad I got to spend time with them at Bo James on Friday as well. It was fun to hang out with the old crew from Freshman year. I'm glad they gave me a second chance because I know a lot of people that haven't been so forgiving. We all ended up crashing at Matt's and then watching the game there the next morning.

I went to dinner for my birthday with my parents that evening too! Bennigans (my favorite!). It was fun. I get emotional sometimes when I see things that remind me of the decisions that I have to make in my life. I don't know why but it just hits me. At the mall there were kids with their parents. It is hard. I don't know if I want to get married at all. I know for sure that I am going to have kids (whether it be through adoption or other means). I think it would be a blast to be a single dad but I also see the benefits of finding someone special. I am not sure what I am looking for at this point in my life so I am just having fun. Whatever becomes of it is not something that I'm going to worry about. I'll make that decision when I'm older (and hopefully wiser).

Today my mommy took me to get a new suit. I need it for interviews. They're coming up here (both job and dental school). I need to practice answering questions and the likes. Ah! I have to grow up a little bit here. I'm about to get into the real world; or closer to it. Scary! The whole interview thing is just another thing that is mind boggling to me along with the whole kid situation. I don't know if I want to get a job or go to dental school. I really want to get out of Iowa City but at the same time I want to be a Dentist. It is rough! I know I can be good at whatever I choose to do with my life but I'm not sure which direction to head. Working with Junior High kids is really fun and it makes me want to do Pediatric Dentistry even more than I had originally thought. Being an engineer would be cool too; I'd get to geek out everyday of my life.

I think I've gotten enough into the issues that have been bothering me lately. And the two songs that I talked about awhile ago are the following.

Cardinal Trait - Nowhere Land
July for Kings - Normal Life

Listen to them and you'll understand the two issues that are conflicting in my life. I'm in no rush to make a decision either way at this point. I'm really enjoying my life right now.

my leg is sleeping

Lemonade. I love it. I used to be obsessed with it when Miles and I mowed. I would make a huge gallon of it and take it out on the day's work. It made me have to go to the bathroom a lot but it was amazing. Yellow lemonade is the drink of my choice.

Today was kind of long. I had to pee really badly at practice and I had to run it. I should have gone before practice today. Yikes. I had to jog in and jog back quick. Luckily there are two coaches or I wouldn't have made it.

There was a coaches' meeting for basketball tonight as well. It was informative. There are a lot of rules that are really confusing to me right now. I'll just memorize them here when I have time.

I went to Christie's concert tonight after the meeting. It was at West High; if it would have been anywhere else I probably wouldn't have gone. It was just convenient right after the meeting. The music was good. It reminded me of when I was a kid and all the music from the Disney movies. I like things that remind me of when I was a kid (hence my teddy bears).

I sat behind the piano (well it wasn't in the way when I sat down) so I couldn't see her for the first piece. Then she moved and I could see her. I don't think she saw me but that is okay.

Tomorrow is a huge day. Test; gameday; flag football; and then hanging out. Hopefully I'll be able to make it through the test. That is really my biggest concern. I have studied a lot more than I did for my first test. It is pretty much brute memorization for these classes. Hopefully I'll do fine.

They moved the game from Monday to Thursday. This gives us an extra day of practice to prepare for our last game. I'm kind of bummed about it but we really don't have enough kids for a reserve game. I'd like to see those kids play more but it is what it is.

Anyways back to the grind.